You breath heavily and finally stop running back to your hive, red tears streaming down around the edges of your eyes.
You did this farely often as of late. But who could blame you really? Not a single one of your friends would even so much as listen to a single sentence of yours anymore.
Its been so long since a person has actually started a conversation with you, but again, you knew the reason.
You heard the whispers, the rumors... the truths...
'the insufferable' was your regularly used title in everything.
Your friends talked behind your back when they thought you werent around, though you heard them.
The gossip about you had only recently been found out though, resulting in you now heading back to your hive in tears.
And you thought she was the only one who actually cared. even just a bit...
You were walking with Aranea again, hoping she'd give up on trying to get you to go out on dates with your other friends.
"But (y/n)! I just know that you'll have a gr8 time with horuss! You two have been showing signs for a potential black relationship have you not?" she asked with a stupid grin.
You just sighed and shook your head.
"Aranea, I am not inturested in filling out any blackrom quadrants at the moment. Besides, you know I dont really grasp the concept of loving my enemy very well" You let out with a huff, looking ahead of you again.
Aranea's face contorted and she teisted her head to make it look as if she was pointing something out.
"quick. before he sees you." she whispered out, which of coarse peeked your curiosity enough to make you turn your head in exactly the right direction to see your flush-crush walking almost near the two of you but in the opposite direction.
Your mouth curved up into a smile as you opene your mouth to greet him.
"Hey Kankr-MPPH!!!" Aranea quickly slapped a hand over your mouth.
"oh gog (y/n) dont draw his attention! He wont stop babbling on if you do" he said in a whispered tone you could barely make out.
"What? But aranea he isnt that bad he's actually very nice. Dont you ever listen to him?"
"we used to but he just wont stop! he always finds new 'triggers' to tag and the lectures just get longer and longer every time!!!!!!!!" she said with a slight wave of her arms.
"Aranea what do you want me to do go up to him and say 'Hey kankri i cant be your friend because you talk way too much and all of your lectures arent even inturesting. also everyone apperantly thinks you're an insufferable prick so i guess i should too!'?"
Aranea didnt answer you so you followed her wide-eyed gaze behind you to see something you thought you wouldnt ever see.
Kankri was behind you with red tears in his eyes.
Just as you were about to tell him what had happened he darted off.
Your face brightened as you saw your good friend (y/n) speaking with Aranea. You decided greating her would be in both of your inturests so you walked over.
You stopped dead in your tracks when you heard what (y/n) had to say however.
"Hey kankri i cant be your friend because you talk way too much and all of your lectures arent even inturesting. also everyone apperantly thinks you're an insufferable prick so i guess i should too!"
You practically felt your heart shatter. The one person who always listened, always cared even when no one else did.
Tears began forming at the edges at your eyes.
When she turned her head to speak to you you just bolted away. You couldnt take this anymore.
-back to the present-
You finally arrived at your hive.
Upon unlocking the door you grabbed a piece of paper from the stand and a pen and began writing.
As soon as you'd finished and read over your note a sad smile graced your face for a moment then left just as swiftly as it had come.
You turned and quickly locked the door, walking up the stares to your room with the note grasped in your hand.
The tears on your face only quickened as you sat on your bed.
You opened your drawr and took out a small pistol that you kept with you... just in case.
You smiled as the tears streamed down your face.
They probably wouldnt find you for a long time. Maybe they wouldnt look.
But none of that mattered now, nothing really mattered at all.
You clutched the note tighter in your hand as you shakily put the pistol to your head.
In a very hushed whisper you let out a small
"Trigger Warning" before pulling the trigger.
You ran quickly after Kankri but man was he fast, by the time you'd reached his door it was already firmly locked.
leaning to the side you pulled a key out of the potted plant he kept by his door.
You shook your head, the silly troll would never learn to hide his keys better.
Just as you were about to turn the key you heard a loud bang, your eyes widened in realiztion of what that was.
Quickly you fumbled with the key, eventually getting it open and running upstairs.
Tears began streaming down your face when you saw him.
He'd done it. He had finally done it.
You ran to him hoping you could at least get him to wake up, but o no avail.
Your tears dampened his sweater as you pulled his lifeless warm body into your arms, cradling him as if you were the only thing keeping him alive.
But you werent. He was dead. And it was all because of you.
You looked to the pistol then to Kankri's other hand. He was holding a small note.
You grabbed the note out of his hand and read it, tears flowing at full speed once more.
You turned to him and kissed his lips, still faintly warm.
You grasped his hand in yours and the pistol in the other.
"I l-love you too, Kankri" were the last words you uttered before pulling the trigger yourself.
y9u may 6e the 9nly 9ne t9 l99k f9r me if I am g9ne f9r m9re than a day s9 I'm assuming y9u've f9und me,
6y n9w I've already d9ne what I'd tried t9 s9 many times 6ef9re.
And I just wanted t9 say that I am utterly, truly, and deeply flushed f9r y9u.
I kn9w y9u hate me like the 9thers d9 s9 this w9n't fase y9u.
6ut... g99d6ye <3